Today it's the tenth day of January

And that means that this evening, it's already been one year since you died.
I had a good time at Christmas, but it was sad to not have you there for the first time in my life. Last Christmas was hard, since we all knew it was gonna be your last here with us. Even thou we did hope you would get better, we slowly realized that you wouldn't. January was a hard month, and I stayed by your side as you quickly got very sick. You slipped away faster than we thought at the end, even thou we slowly lost you over the last years. It was hard to see you, my grandma, disappearing after grandpa died. How the dementia took you away from us, and how you just gave up on living. It's hard to loose a person over such a long period, and after a while they're not themselves anymore. They just exist and look like the person you love, but they're not really there. They have this empty look in they're eyes. Like the eyes have no soul anymore. I see it all the time, when I meet patients with dementia. It makes me sad, because it reminds me of you. Empty sad eyes. And I want to remember the good times, but still, the last days and years of your life is what I remember the most. I hope that one day I can forget the bad part. Because for almost 20 years of my life, it was only good times with you. I wish you could have stayed here longer with us, but I know you missed grandpa so much that you just couldn't bear it. I truly hope you and grandpa are together again, and that you both are happy. We all miss you so much.

Tenk at det allerede har gått ett år bestemor. Jeg savner deg sånn.